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Our Grief is our Strength

 

"Our choice is to be in love or to be in fear. But to choose to be in love means to have a mountain inside of you, means to have the heart of the world inside you, means you will feel another's suffering inside your own body and you will weep. You will have no protection from the world's pain, because it will be your own." - China Galland

There are many who will tell you that it is not a time for grief, but a time to be joyously empowered, because we are waking up.

While it is true that there is a wild and exciting opportunity in this moment for us to call forth our greatest wise warrior (and I pray we do), and it is also true that the circumstances of our moment are enabling a greater awakening about what is sacred and what truly matters, it is equally as important that we honor whatever grief or pain or fear or anger is arising within us right now.

That IS part of our awakening.

To allow ourselves to feel this deeply is a sacred gift that reveals our deepest longing and, ultimately, our love.

 To those of you with heartfelt intentions telling others not to feel sadness or grief: please be mindful of our individual ways of holding the pain of our world. Sometimes those are the exact emotions we need to feel to come deeper into our broken hearts and allow the fire of love to burn.

We all hold the pain of our world within us and we handle it in our own unique ways. To honor that, is to be in service to our world.

And to those of you who are impatiently telling people to "get over it": you are really missing the point.

This is not about Democrats or Republicans or people being upset because their candidate lost. This is about far more than our current election. For many, it is a grief that they cannot fully name.

Our hearts are broken because of the deep ignorance and pain in our world that this election has revealed. Ignorance that we also see reflected in the violence against Protectors at Standing Rock. Many of us have felt this for a long time, but the violent rhetoric and actions of confused souls is vividly painful in this moment.  It cannot be ignored.

This deep manipulation of our mental and spiritual environment, which keeps people from trusting their own experience, from speaking the truth of what they see and feel and know is happening in our world, has revealed itself through tear-stained epiphanies.

So many are awakening to the numbness of hearts and minds that is so present in our society. We do not want to feel numb; we do not want to be part of this dead system.

We cannot continue with business as usual.

There is a collective awareness greater than there has ever been before, and it is painful to shed that layer of skin that has held us small for so long.

Because we know the qualities of true leadership are compassionate, emotionally intelligent, connected and wise.

Leadership takes into account the wholeness of the system, not merely one compartmentalized part;
Leadership connects people together and forms allies through communication and deep listening;
Leadership respects and honors all people, regardless of sex, color, religious beliefs, etc;
Leadership is grounded and mature and speaks with calm, patient understanding;
Leadership considers planet and people over profit and embraces conscious capitalism and opportunity that considers all aspects of life while prioritizing what is truly important.

These are not the qualities present in the future leadership of this country. And we ache for that. We know, ultimately, that it is within ourselves that we must embody these qualities and, still, we long to see them in someone who holds the position as a leader of our country and influencer of our world.

And so, we grieve.

We feel the pain of each person who is taunted for their faith or judged for the color of their skin. We feel the fear of the young girl who is grabbed and treated inferior because she is a woman. We feel the suffering of our planet and of each being without clean water, clean air, healthy food.

This pain, this grief, that so many feel right now, is not just an individual pain. This is a collective pain. We are grieving for our world.

Please listen to what is alive in you right now. Honor that. Know that the depth you are feeling is an opening to the tremendous amount of love for our world and your passion for justice. Explore it, hold it, breathe with it. And when you are ready, take the deep wisdom that it reveals and allow it to move you into sacred action.

We are all in this together. Our grief is our strength. It invites us through the doorway of our soul and from that raw, broken open place, the real conversation begins.

 

 

What People Are Saying...

Val, thank you for your unwavering compassion, infinite love, and timeless wisdom. You are such a great teacher. You have shown me, not only through example, but also through your workshops ...